Feeling ready: Preparing for your first online therapy session
Beginning therapy is a big step, and it can sometimes feel daunting. Approaching midlife and later life, this step often comes alongside a busy mix of commitments — from career and caring roles to changes in health, relationships, and future plans.
Choosing to do therapy online means you can set aside time for yourself without the extra travel or scheduling stress. You can meet from a space that feels familiar and safe, yet it’s normal to wonder: Will it feel personal enough? How should I get ready?
With the right setup and an experienced psychologist, online therapy is just as effective as in-person sessions, and what matters most is the quality of the connection you and your therapist build together.
While online therapy offers convenience — both location and travel time — a little preparation can also help you join feeling focused and ready to get the most out of your session — and the most out of your next chapter!
1. Choose a space where you can talk openly
Look for a spot that feels comfortable and private — that favourite nook, a favourite chair. Silencing phone notifications, and for some people, using headphones can help create a bubble of focus. Privacy matters: Feeling relaxed in your surroundings makes it easier to share openly with your therapist, especially when life is full of competing demands. Online therapy also levels the playing field by letting you stay in the comfort of your home zone, without having to step into the therapist’s place of work.
2. Do a quick tech check
Take five minutes the day before to test your link, camera, microphone, and internet connection, and to make sure your device is charged. Even small tech snags can cause last minute stress, and a quick check can help you tune in and feel more settled. Upside Stories can also help you out — we can help with your setup ahead of time and adjust the session on the day to your needs.
3. Set yourself a light intention
You don’t need a perfect plan. Jot down a few prompts to help yourself tune in to yourself and turn on your curiosity. For example:
What would a good first session look like?
What’s been hard for me lately?
What’s been working well for me lately?
If I woke up tomorrow with super-powers, how would my life be different?
A simple starting point can help you and your therapist find focus together — a shared focus that research studies show builds the therapeutic relationship and supports better outcomes.
4. Expect it to feel different — but still human
Some people wonder if a screen can get in the way of connection. Studies show the working alliance in online therapy is just as good as with in-person support, and where differences appear, they’re often small.
What matters most is the empathy, clarity, and shared purpose you build together. Studies also indicate that therapists may share more of their own thoughts, feelings, and experiences in online sessions, which can humanise the experience and deepen the therapeutic relationship. And remember, online therapy sessions with Upside Stories are supportive, relaxed, and down-to-earth. We’ve been through our own ups and downs in life — we get you.
5. Bring yourself as you are
You don’t have to join with the “right” words. If you’re unsure where to start, it’s fine to say so — your therapist will help you shape the conversation. You’ll find that our first session together is really a chance to find out more about what brings you into therapy, and a chance to keep getting to know each other. This fairly guided approach, in your first session, can really take the pressure off if you’re feeling unsure where to start.
6. Give yourself a few minutes afterwards
Without the physical commute home, it’s easy to dive straight into the next task. Take a moment instead — stretch, step outside, go for a short walk and move, or jot one key thought from the session. This small pause can help you integrate the work and carry it into the rest of your day.
Why preparation matters
These small steps — making space, checking your tech, setting an intention — aren’t about perfection. They’re about giving yourself the best chance to feel present, so you and your therapist can start building the connection that makes therapy effective.
At Upside Stories, we believe that a strong therapeutic relationship and insightful questions lead to positive change. Through a practical, strengths-based approach, we support you through midlife and beyond by building on what’s already working, reflecting on your life experiences, and exploring new ways to solve problems and grow.
Feeling ready to begin?
If you’re ready to take that next step, why not start with a call? Arrange a free 20-minute consult to explore your next chapter.
References & reading
Aafjes-van Doorn, K., Spina, D. S., Horne, S. J., & Békés, V. (2024). The association between quality of therapeutic alliance and treatment outcomes in teletherapy: A systematic review and meta-analysis. Clinical Psychology Review, 110, 102430. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.cpr.2024.102430
Bertolazzi, A., Quaglia, V., & Bongelli, R. (2024). Barriers and facilitators to health technology adoption by older adults with chronic diseases: An integrative systematic review. BMC Public Health, 24, 506. https://doi.org/10.1186/s12889-024-18036-5
Luo, X., Aafjes-van Doorn, K., Békés, V., Prout, T. A., & Hoffman, L. (2023). Therapist self-disclosure in teletherapy early in the COVID-19 pandemic: Associations with real relationship and traumatic distress. Clinical Psychology & Psychotherapy. Advance online publication. https://doi.org/10.1002/cpp.2915
Mitchell, E. (2020). “Much more than second best”: Therapists’ experiences of videoconferencing psychotherapy. European Journal for Qualitative Research in Psychotherapy, 10, 121-135. https://doi.org/10.24377/EJQRP.article2991
Saxler, E., Schindler, T., Philipsen, A., Schulze, M., & Lux, S. (2024). Therapeutic alliance in individual adult psychotherapy: A systematic review of conceptualizations and measures for face-to-face- and online-psychotherapy. Frontiers in Psychology, 15, 1293851. https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyg.2024.1293851
Simpson, S., Richardson, L., Pietrabissa, G., Castelnuovo, G., & Reid, C. (2021). Videotherapy and therapeutic alliance in the age of COVID-19. Clinical Psychology & Psychotherapy, 28(2), 409–421. https://doi.org/10.1002/cpp.2521
Vizza, J., Riahi, S., Jackson, O., Potvin, C., & Rudoler, D. (2025). Therapy in the digital age: Exploring in-person and virtual cognitive behavioural therapy. BMC Psychiatry, 25, 615. https://doi.org/10.1186/s12888-025-07063-0
Weckler, L., Lampe, L., & Beutel, M. E. (2022). Videoconferencing versus face-to-face psychotherapy: Patients’ attitudes, therapeutic alliance and empathy. Clinical Psychology & Psychotherapy, 29(6), 1985–1999. https://doi.org/10.1002/capr.12538
